CapitalOne Credit Cards Complaint - Plan to get marketing managers attention
Richmond, Va. 23295-001 December 13,2005
Attention: Michael Robertson Dir. New Accounts
I have a short story to tell you. A story that I intend to relate only once so you may want to keep this correspondence on file for future reference. You’ll see why as we progress here.
Approximately two years ago this coming January 2006 I received an offer for your card. This was probably the fifth or sixth direct mail unrequested letter that I had received from CapitalOne in three months. This time instead of simply discarding the letter I opened it and sent it back unsigned with a note that I did not care to apply for the card. In a matter of thirty days I received a valid credit card with my name on it and a statement for $35.00. I cut up the card and threw the letter away. In approximately five months, this unauthorized card had gone from a card that I did not want to a $35.00 unpaid bill and sent to D&B for collection. CapitalOne had taken my account and imposed upon me a negative credit standing without me so much as even signing my name to any document or application. Shortly after the D&B report showing the charge, I notice that a second person has been added to the account. The name Taum Som now frequently appears on the mail I receive from your idiots in your mail marketing.
I failed to get your attention when I called the 800 number to have my name removed from your mailing list. I failed to get your attention when I wrote your company President and copied you last week.
Now the reason for keeping this letter on file.
Obviously your marketing manager has a terrific budget for direct mail. We noticed that your return permit #1837 has an unlimited return authorization on it. That’s good because to send me a letter in the future, it is going to cost CapitalOne more money and more time. I have decided to copy the envelope titled “BUSINESS REPLY MAIL” along with the first class permit number 1837 and the mail code zip at the bottom of the envelope and use it for my “return mail” as intended. There is going to be one slight change in this procedure. I will attach this “postage will be paid by addressee” to a package containing some wood scrap from my woodshop. I think that probably a thirty seven inch length of 2X4 would suffice for the intended purpose. Being over thirty six inches long and unbendable, the package(s) will require special handling by the USPS and your mail room. I think the weight will be around eight to 10 pounds each. This will place the cost at about $35 to $45 each for the first class postage.
Quite an imposition on both the USPS and CapitalOne but it will give you some idea of the imposition you create on this end whenever you send me another unwanted application for a card that has one of the highest APR rates in the industry.
My friends also think this is a great example of how to treat unwanted trash mail. They suggested that I put the idea and this letter on the net so more people could participate in the program. We’ll put it on every blog that is spidered by Google and Jeeves and all the others so that in about the next thirty days we could have (maybe) 30,000 people sending you some nice piles of expensive wood scrap. We will scan the prepaid reply envelope and attach it as a page for their copying convenience. Maybe this will get your attention.
Pissed because you screwed with my credit rating without cause or authorization.